addictive

I think I have what could be described as an addictive personality. How else could you explain my insane adoration for anything chocolate. Or my sudden and obsessive love of running, especially in the rain. Yes, I cling onto things and have a hard time letting go.

This is why, when I decide that something should no longer be part of my life- chocolate, clothes, boys- I must get rid of it quickly and completely. No joke. For the fun year of 2005 I decided to give up chocolate. Cold turkey. Much to the surprise of everyone who has ever met me, I made it the entire year. That was the same year I fell in love with triathlons. During that summer, I thought it would be good to also give up candy, cookies (except for after a race), cake, pie, ice cream, donuts. You name it, I didn't eat it. And then, that fall I decided to train for a marathon and I quit drinking and eating pizza. Hmm, what the hell did I eat??

Anyway, I think it is that time again. I figure posting this endeavor on my blog is the best way to keep me from cheating. From this day forward..... I am not eating candy. (And Halloween so close!!!) No Snickers, no Butterfingers, Twix, Starburst, Peanutbutter cups, Jolly Ranchers, 3 Musketeers, Milky Way, Baby Ruth, Take 5, Rolos, Sour Patch Kids....I could go on forever. This is just the beginning. Cold turkey, but I have to start small.

This is my world... and there's no candy in it.

dog years

I think over the last couple years, my body has started aging faster. I feel much older than my 27 years. My knee aches, my shin hurts, my back is sore, and don't even get me started on my sciatic/buttocks! And, I'm always tired! ALWAYS! Yet, I cannot sleep through the night! I might have to finally admit it, I'm doing too much. But, am I? I work normal hours (8-4:30), go to bed at a reasonable hour (even though I never sleep through the night) I eat, constantly (and lately much more healthy). Sure, I try to get to the gym six days a week, and some are some pretty intense workouts, but no more than other people I know. I think I'm just getting old.

Actually, I'm pretty sure it has to do with my level of general contentment. I feel myself sinking. Or, I guess I experience a deep sinking feeling in my chest and heart daily. These come from a variety of occurrences. Like Monday's was because my leg was killing me and I realized that a hamstring injury could really derail my training. So, off to the couch with an ice bag. Yesterday, I randomly emailed the guy who was my best friend through most of high school and I've intermittently stayed in contact with over the last few years. His return email only made me feel so far behind as he is now engaged and they bought a house last summer. In fact, everyone I knew in high school and college are married and buying houses. I'm not even dating. And while I have no intention of having children, or even getting married until my 30's... it'd be nice to think that someday I'd be on track for that. Or more, it'd be nice to have that one person to call. A standing Friday or Saturday date. Someone to call "we"

These are the dog years. I'm aging fast and down in the dumps.

there's a time delay in my world

Sometimes I do things and the full impact doesn't hit me until later. Well, in this case it was about three months. That's huge. June 30, 2007 I registered for Ironman Coeur d'Alene. Okay, so I'm not stupid, I know what the distances are in a full Ironman. I was getting ready to complete a Half IM on July 8. So, even though I knew the distances I don't think I was fully comprehending the totality of it all. My mind was more focused on the $475 dollar entry fee that I just charged to my credit card (plus misc. fees), and also finding a new place to live, and preparing for the three triathlons I had coming up later in the summer, and spending time with my adorable niece. Well, all that is over now. My last tri was September 9. Joram and I are fully moved into the new place and my sister and niece have moved back across the country. And there I was, last Friday after work at the gym. Not many others were there and my mind was wandering. I head back to my cubicle after my run to check my email and I started looking up some stuff on IM's. And then it hit me. Like a freaking ton of bricks. I suddenly couldn't breathe, I was crying, I was full on in panic mode. What the hell was I thinking that I could complete an Ironman?? I was reading the time limits and how many times you could get DQ'd and I was FREAKING OUT. I called my mom. "It's finally hit me" I'd been waiting for it to hit me for 3 months. I think my mom had too "Are you ok?" "No, I'm in my car and I can't make myself drive" "Do you want me to come up there?" "No." So, I panicked a bit more and my mom talked me down off the proverbial ledge and I made it home. I'm still a bit nauseated every time I think about it though. And to make it better, I'm pretty sure there's a small tear in my left hamstring. Awesome. Stairs are fun!

it's a feathered conspiracy

Birds. I'm not their biggest fan. In fact, sometimes they really frighten me. I had a crazy tiny bird fly into my head in college while I was walking between classes. Okay, so it didn't totally hit me, but it grazed my hair, and other people witnessed it. All I could do was laugh- even though it scared the heck out of me. And as my friend Josh could tell you from a trip to San Francisco, seagulls aren't my friends either. This weekend I had another run in with one of the winged creatures. I was minding my own business while on a nice Saturday morning run. My iPod blasting NKOTB....err... I mean the latest in today's hits when out of nowhere this nutlike pod comes flying from nowhere barely missing my head! "wtf?" I'm thinking to myself and I glance up to see a crow in a divebomb towards my brain! I panic and jump awkwardly and make a strange sound (I'm sure to the amusement of the oncoming car). Damn bird nearly took me out!!!

These are the things that happen to me.

Welcome to my world

This is my world. It doesn't always make sense. I have a tendency towards random rambling and complaining. But, it's my world, and that's how it's going to be. This blog will be about the interesting, fun, boring, lame, ridiculous things I do/see in my daily life.

Who am I, and what is my daily life? I'm Bri. I have a new roommate after living alone for about 4 and a half years. I've been at the same job for 3 and a half. It's not always fun and exciting, but it allows me to focus on real life. Real life....what's that? My real life is outside the four cubicle walls that contain me from 8 to 4:30 five days a week. My real life is on the road and in the gym. I'm obsessed with the gym and how I look, and how far and fast I can run. Albeit, I'm not that fast, and I only look ok (I also have a passion for sweets). But, it is my obsession. More exact, triathlons are my love. I've done a total of 13 of them in the past three seasons (began in summer 2005). Also, a handful of 5k's, 2 half marathons, and a full marathon in there as well. More importantly, 9 months and 1 day from now, a full Ironman.

This is my world.